UNEMPLOYMENT OLYMPICS @ TOMPKINS SQUARE PARK: TUESDAY, 3/31/9 @ 1:30PM.

Okay, maybe you have been laid off. That doesn't mean you get to become a slothful waste of flesh who just sits around staring at Diff'rent Strokes re-runs all day. Nope. You need to get out there and show the world that you can still compete.

Just come on down to the Unemployment Olympics with some kind of proof of unemployment—last pay stub, something from the Department of Labor, glassy-eyed despair—and you'll be eligible to compete in pie-throwing contests, fax machine tosses, and races to the unemployment office. Prizes include Kinko's gift certificates, a month of free health insurance, and proof that you aren't all alone out there. Seriously. You should go.

Unemployment Olympics
Tuesday, 3/31/9 @ 1:30PM
Tompkins Square Park
Avenue A between 7th and 10th Streets
RSVP to nick2ny@gmail.com